Press Ganey Scores and Unicorns

adorable animal canine 1564506


A unicorn is a mythical creature. It does not exist.  

Which brings me to Press Ganey scores.  

For those of you entirely immune to the numeric patient satisfaction benchmarks, Press Ganey is eponymous with HCAHPS scores mandated by CMS. HCAHPS was initially rolled out to allow comparisons between institutions providing inpatient care. How satisfied are patients receiving care at those institutions. Like any federal mandate, it grew. Patient satisfaction surveys are now ubiquitous. They are now tailored to rate individual physician practices; emergency departments, urgent care centers, and dialysis units.  

Broadly, I think information gained related to patient feedback can be useful.  

But there are three important caveats. 

There must be a meaningful sample size to draw conclusions. 

The feedback must be gathered close in time to when services were rendered. 

Detailed comments are more important than numeric scores. 

I’ve been on a search for the single physician who is a fan of Press Ganey scores. I exclude those who have a connection to the company. I exclude those who work in administration (where scores are used to determine how much the institution is reimbursed). I’m just looking for that physician who says these scores are meaningful to them. And they find the scores to be constructive criticism allowing them to improve their service.  

Candidly, I’ve not found that unicorn yet. I’ll keep looking. 

Here are the beefs I HAVE heard in my quest. 

Most patients throw letters from Press Ganey in the trash. The surveys are not filled out. The “n” is too low.  

Most patient who receive emails from Press Ganey press the delete button. The “n” remains low. 

If a patient does complain, by the time their response is collated, too much time has gone by. It’s hard to do proper service recovery when there’s a giant chasm between when the patient was seen and when their response was received. 

Many physicians believe we are teaching to the test; that patient perception of how care is delivered is valued more than the actual care itself. As to whether there is merit to that claim, I cannot say. But that is a strong perception. Put differently, if a doctor is generous with pain medication or provides requested antibiotics for viral infections, the fact that that patient is satisfied seems to matter more than data related safety and clinical outcomes.  

Every doctor will at some point become a patient. When you become a patient, you will want care to be delivered with respect. You will want to be treated by dignity. So, there is merit to doing our best to learn about how we deliver care. I’m just not convinced the best way to do that is by chasing unicorns.  

What do you think? Click here to quickly join the conversation and share your thoughts with us below.


ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Jeffrey Segal, MD, JD

Dr. Jeffrey Segal, Chief Executive Officer and Founder of Medical Justice, is a board-certified neurosurgeon. In the process of conceiving, funding, developing, and growing Medical Justice, Dr. Segal has established himself as one of the country’s leading authorities on medical malpractice issues, counterclaims, and internet-based assaults on reputation.

Dr. Segal received his M.D. from Baylor College of Medicine, where he also completed a neurosurgical residency. Dr. Segal served as a Spinal Surgery Fellow at The University of South Florida Medical School. He is a member of Phi Beta Kappa as well as the AOA Medical Honor Society. Dr. Segal received his B.A. from the University of Texas and graduated with a J.D. from Concord Law School with highest honors.

Dr. Segal is also a partner at Byrd Adatto, a national business and health care law firm. With over 50 combined years of experience in serving doctors, dentists, and other providers, Byrd Adatto has a national pedigree to address most legal issues that arise in the business and practice of medicine.

If you have a medico-legal question, write to Medical Justice at infonews@medicaljustice.com.com.

Why Facebook Advertising Can Be Dangerous for Doctors

social media marketing for doctors

Before we dive in, some fast advice. Social media is wrought with regulatory landmines. Doctors can use the space to their practice’s benefit, but you must be cognizant of the pitfalls. If you are navigating the online space, don’t go it alone. Schedule a free consultation with our Founder and CEO, Jeff Segal, MD, JD. He can supply guidance specific to your practice’s circumstances and goals. The TCPA is another regulatory landmine catching doctors off-guard. And the costs of those screw-ups are humbling. When you finish reading this article, take some time to study the TCPA (as it relates to doctors) in depth.  

Facebook has been with us for fifteen years. In three years, it will old enough to vote. What an invigorating thought.  

In those fifteen years, Facebook has distinguished itself as one of the most powerful advertising platforms on the planet. It has also made a name for itself as a regulatory compliance hazard. The desire to participate is strong. And the advantages of mastering the platform are plentiful. Doctors (particularly doctors in cash-pay fields) who ignore Facebook risk forfeiting coveted market share. Qualified patients may perceive a practice with no social media presence as out of touch. But those who embrace social media unconditionally risk making costly mistakes. FTC violations and breaches of patient confidentiality are the foremost concerns.  

Our members have voiced concerns about their social media endeavors in the past. We’ve assembled a list of their most commonly asked questions… 

Can we leverage social media in a way that minimizes the perceived risks and maximizes the benefits?  

“Can we use social media to advertise to users who are also patients? 

Are Facebook’s native marketing tools HIPAA compliant?  

My competitor is using Facebook’s custom audience integration. I suspect he’s targeting my patients deliberately. How does that work? 

This article will answer these questions and address many others. Let’s start by answering two big questions… 

How does Facebook advertising work, anyway? More importantly – why should doctors care?  

Facebook advertising works by asking questions. A doctor cannot use Facebook to advertise to its users until he tells Facebook who to target. Doctors should familiarize themselves with these processes so they can foreclose the misuse of these tools. If your practice manager suggests leveraging Facebook ads, you need to understand the risks. The road to targeted advertising is paved with regulatory landmines. 

Before a doctor can advertise through Facebook, he must first create something called an audience. This is an important step, as only members of a doctor’s audience are exposed to his advertisements. The process starts with a questionnaire. Its purpose is to define the doctor’s ideal patient. 

Is your ideal patient male or female? Non-binary? How old are they? Where do they live? What is their estimated income level? What are their hobbies? Political affiliations? Collegiate allegiances? Shoe size? You can get surgical (pun intended) with your specifications or swing for the fences.  

For example, an aesthetic surgeon practicing in Beverly Hills, California could tell Facebook he wants to target users who meet the following criteria… 

Female… 

Age 30 to 55… 

Married… 

Living in Beverly Hills, CA… 

The doctor’s advertisements are then served to Facebook users who possess these four traits. Facebook does this by comparing the doctor’s description of an ideal patient to data its users have volunteered about themselves. 

An audience constructed in this way is classified as a core audience.  Audiences come in three varieties. The remaining classifications are customized audiences and lookalike audiences, and we’ll dissect all three before this article’s conclusion.  

We believe core audience advertising is the least problematic of the three, as there is little room for the physician to betray the doctor-patient relationship. You cannot target specific users. You can only target a swathe of nonspecific users who claim to possess the traits you’ve specified.  

Core audience targeting is useful because it allows physicians to serve ads to nodes of qualified leads. When clicked, the hypothetical advertisements we’ve described would likely direct the qualified user to the surgeon’s website. The user could then research the specialist, study his offerings, examine patient reviews, view before and after images, and contact the office directly to schedule a consultation. While the targeting process is eerie, there are no obvious compliance issues.  

Which brings us to the second prong of our fork in the road and the axis of this article: Facebook Custom Audiences.

So – what makes the Custom Audience tool problematic for doctors? 

Custom audience targeting allows doctors to serve specific ads to specific Facebook users – i.e., their existing patients. How is this possible? Like with core audience targeting, it requires the physician to do some legwork. He must either feed Facebook patient data or create an environment where data can be extracted from patients. The physician can achieve this utilizing one (or a combination of) the three techniques described below. 

The doctor can upload a list of his existing patients to Facebook 

+ The doctor can tag visitors as they leave his practice’s website… 

+ The doctor can tag users interacting with his customized smartphone app… 

We’ll start by analyzing the most straightforward option – uploading a list of existing patients to Facebook.  

The process is not complicated. Facebook presents the business owner (doctor) with a node. The doctor attaches a spreadsheet to this node, and the file is delivered to Facebook. The spreadsheet is presumably populated with data Facebook will use to identify specific users.  

[DOWNLOAD FACEBOOK’S SAMPLE TEMPLATE]

Data provided is flushed against Facebook’s user records. If a name or email on the spreadsheet can be matched to a name or email within Facebook’s database, Facebook will assume that user is a member of your custom audience. This user is now a candidate for your advertisement.  

But more importantly – you’ve just told Facebook there is a strong possibility that every entity on your uploaded list is your patient. At the very least, you’ve presented Facebook with enough context to infer a relationship. 

This process is not unlike visiting a library. We approach the librarian (or engage with a computer) and offer a piece of data – the title of a book, its genre, its author, etc. That information is used to isolate the object of our desires and extract it.  

Facebook’s priorities when constructing this tool were likely: ease of use and utility. Regulatory compliance was less than an afterthought, and this is not a criticism. Facebook’s job was to create a system that allowed business owners to advertise to qualified candidates. In this respect, they succeeded. The problem is that the legislation that regulates the sale of most commercial goods is less robust than what you’d find in the healthcare industry.  

Should your local coffee shop seek permission before uploading a list of customers to Facebook? Yes. But our point is the coffee shop does not need to worry about a spontaneous HIPAA audit. The physician a practicing a few miles up the road does.  

We could dedicate the rest of this article to brainstorming all the nefarious ways the custom audience interface could violate a patient’s privacy. We won’t go that far, but here is a choice example to drive our point. 

You are a physician who treats HIV positive patients. Your patient is receiving treatment for HIV. His contact information is uploaded to Facebook using the methods we’ve described. That patient is then served advertisements for HIV related items: trial therapies, assorted medications, case studies, etc. Let’s pretend a loved one is looking over his shoulder while he is browsing Facebook. Perhaps at a holiday gathering. If this loved one sees the ads in great frequency, the dots may be connected.  

And if it wasn’t obvious, let’s make two things clear – not only have you told Facebook a specific user is your patient, you’ve implied Facebook that user has HIV.  

Without explicit authorization from a patient, physicians cannot upload a list of their patients to Facebook for the purpose of targeted advertising. Facebook is not a HIPAA business associate. Taking such action anyway is a recipe for regulatory catastrophe. The fact that a patient may have previously clicked through Facebook’s terms of use to use its platform will not save you.  

But what if a physician still wants to use custom audience advertising? Recall he has three options to consider when creating a custom audience. Uploading a list of existing “customers” is only one option.  

So, what about the other two? Are they any better?  

We’ll keep our opinions to ourselves – at least until we’ve finished explaining how each works. Until then, we encourage you to study the mechanics described and cast your own predictions. 

Let’s asses the risks of tracking website visitors with Facebook… 

If a physician is against uploading a list of patients to Facebook, he can still help Facebook identify strong candidates for his services by tracking people who visit his website. The process works like this: the physician inserts a snippet of code – called the Facebook Pixel – into his practice’s website. Not his practice’s Facebook profile – his actual website.  

When someone visits his website, the visitor is “tagged” by this pixel. To borrow a metaphor from Mother Nature – the prospective patient (a bee) visits the doctor’s website (the flower) and then, after interacting with his website, the visitor leaves with that special code we referenced earlier – the Facebook Pixel – embedded in his web browser. 

Think of the Facebook Pixel as a grain of pollen and the visitor’s web browser as a pollen brush – the part of the bee that collects the pollen. When the prospective patient returns to his Facebook account, that piece of code (the grain of pollen) interacts with Facebook’s own internal mechanisms. That visitor is then identified as a candidate for the physician’s advertisements. Not long after this “cross pollination” takes place, the visitor’s newsfeed is blooming with advertisements for the doctor’s services.  

If you’ve ever wondered why ads for products you’ve recently browsed on Amazon mysteriously appear in your Facebook feed, now you know.  

And much like in the real world, the grain of pollen (Facebook’s tracking code) does not ask the bee (the patient) if it can hitchhike – it just hangs on for the ride, and pollination happens naturally.  

Is this a problem? The entity in our example isn’t a patient, after all. He’s a “prospective” patient. Meaning the integral doctor-patient relationship doesn’t exist – yet. But what happens when he becomes a patient? Or what if he is an existing patient who has, for one reason or another, never previously visited his physician’s website?  

Assuming he isn’t a patient – once he becomes a patient, can his doctor remotely expunge this pixel from the patient’s web browser and exclude him from his advertising?  Yes and no. The doctor can tell Facebook to “exclude” a visitor if the visitor fulfills certain conditions when visiting the practice’s website. If the patient visits a special page (a patient portal, for example), he can, in theory, be excluded from advertising. This is an imperfect solution. For one, this strategy only works if the doctor can guarantee every patient will take the manual actions required to exclude himself from advertising. If even one patient deviates from the route his doctor has constructed for him, he’ll continue seeing ads.  

Onto the less obvious problem – inferencing. The purpose of advertising on social media is to drive qualified leads to your business. For doctors, this means driving qualified patients to their practices. Facebook did not build this advertising tool with HIPAA in mind, but we can assume Facebook knows why HIPAA exists. We must also assume any bad actors working within Facebook can infer the doctor-patient relationship if they are given enough context. 

Your relationship with the tagged user is not explicit, but it can be inferred. Facebook may have already known Jane Doe’s email and phone number, but this ritual (which you’ve enabled) has taught it something it did not already know – that a business identifying as a doctor’s office considers Jane Doe a candidate for a facelift. Or a bariatric procedure. Or a weight loss regimen. Or whatever services your practice provides. Facebook might serve this data to other third-party advertisers – either intentionally or as result of a security breach. And once advertisers infer a medical condition, pharmaceutical companies may seize that data and insert Ms. Doe into their own targeted campaigns.  

It does not matter if Jane has been regaling her followers with intimate details of her medical affairs for years – what matters is that an entity representing your practice has directly or indirectly identified her as your patient and then passed this information to an entity that is not a HIPAA business associate.  

The purpose of the Facebook Pixel is to facilitate the transfer of information – email, phone number, residence, etc. And if the practice implementing this technique has outsourced the technical work to a third-party who is already unfamiliar with regulatory compliance, imagine the legwork required to keep this entity from self-destructing. And if this third-party isn’t a HIPAA business associate, your problems have gone from bad to very bad. And for all the same reasons we’ve outlined above. With few exceptions, entities that are not HIPAA business associates cannot have access to patient data without the patient’s explicit authorization. 

The spools of yarn unfold onward, upward, and into infinity and beyond. And there’s still one more method to consider.  

It is worth noting doctors can construct a custom audience by extracting data from their practice’s customized smartphone app. This last option is only relevant if your practice offers such an application. Unless you work for large hospital or healthcare network, this last tool likely does not apply to you. The technical details differ, but the principles are identical. As are the compliance issues. When a user opens your application, he is tagged with a snippet of code. This code tracks the user’s behavior as he navigates his phone, covertly collecting data until the user opens Facebook. That user is then identified as a candidate for the business’ advertisements, provided he meets your prescribed criteria. 

We’re left with one more audience to dissect: the lookalike audience.  

This kind of targeting has the potential to be useful to doctors, but it comes with its own set of problems. The fundamental difference between a lookalike audience and its counterparts (core and custom) is that a lookalike audience cannot exist by itself. It must model itself after an existing audience. Meaning the doctor must present Facebook with a collection of data points and tell Facebook: 

“Assemble a new list of people who share traits with this old list of people.”  

The audience you designate as your “sample” can be a custom audience you’ve already created. Or it can be comprised of data points extracted from entities who’ve visited your website. You can also create a lookalike audience based on users who have “liked” your practice’s Facebook page.  

To be clear – the members of your lookalike audience and its sample audience do not co-mingle, unless you jump through some extra hoops. If Jane Doe is in your designated sample, she won’t appear in your lookalike. The objective of the lookalike is to market to new users who qualify for the same services as Jane Doe. Meaning you could offer Facebook a sample of your existing patients and never advertise to the entities featured on that list. 

Is this a problem? It depends on what is used as the sample audience. The scenario we’ve described assumes the doctor has presented Facebook with a list of his existing patients. In this case, our imaginary friend is on the cusp of making a big mistake. Conversely, if he presents Facebook with a collection of character traits like sex, age, income level, and place of residence, he’s straddling a comparatively “safer” fork in the road.  

The reason: He has not offered Facebook information about real patients, or even real people. All he’s fed Facebook is a list of desirable traits.   

We believe physicians can only safely leverage core audience advertising and lookalike audience advertising. And lookalike audiences can only be used if their sample audiences do not contain data extracted from existing patients. Custom audience advertising requires doctors to either upload patient information directly to Facebook or create an environment where it can be extracted without the patient’s consent.  

The congenital heel shared among these tools is their association with social media, a space known for its rapid evolution. In the rush to stay relevant, Facebook churns out tools designed to be used by business owners to engage their online audiences. The dilemma is that these tools are not designed with regulatory compliance in mind. And the frequency of their publication (and their alleged conversion rates) present doctors with new, attractive solutions to old problems, such the recruitment of new patients and the retention of existing ones. 

Creating an advertising tool with complete regulatory compliance in mind across all industries may be possible, but it would likely be ineffective and imprecise – two traits an advertisement platform should not possess. 

The bottom line… 

Learning to use Facebook is not a secret art, nor is it a dark one. There is a learning curve its students must walk – something true of all schools. The depth of this curve varies from user to user, but you should expect to make mistakes. The problem is that most physicians cannot afford to make mistakes online – the regulatory agencies presiding over us cast costly shadows. The TCPA is another regulatory landmine catching doctors off-guard. And the costs of those screw-ups are humbling. When you finish reading this article, take some time to study the TCPA (as it relates to doctors) in depth.

We hope this piece sheds light on some of those shadows. Join the discussion below and let us know your thoughts. But we wager most physicians prefer to avoid triggering these hidden landmines whenever possible. The trick to doing so often lies just beneath their fingertips. A doctor’s smartphone, when used properly, can ward off the worst regulatory disasters. But in the hands of the uninformed physician, smartphones can become regulatory disasters themselves.

Our follow-up piece, available for download below, reveals how smartphones are getting physicians in trouble, and what steps we can take to prevent the technology from damaging our practices and violating our patients’ privacy. The major points addressed are… 

The risks and benefits associated with advertising via patient photographs… 

The prevalence of recording devices in environments physicians previously considered private… 

The temptation presented by text message marketing, and what it is costing doctors who don’t play by the rules…

Don’t Miss Our Follow-Up Piece: 3 Unexpected (And Expensive) Smartphone Landmines Catching Doctors Off-Guard

Learn how Medical Justice can protect you from medico-legal mayhem… 

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Request a Consultation with Our Founder

Medical Justice Founder and CEO, Jeff Segal, MD, JD, provides consultations to doctors in need of guidance. 

Meet the Experts Driving Medical Justice

Our Executive Team walks with our member doctors until their medico-legal obstacles are resolved.

Jeffrey Segal, MD, JD

Chief Executive Officer and Founder

Dr. Jeffrey Segal, Chief Executive Officer and Founder of Medical Justice, is a board-certified neurosurgeon. Dr. Segal is a Fellow of the American College of Surgeons; the American College of Legal Medicine; and the American Association of Neurological Surgeons. He is also a member of the North American Spine Society. In the process of conceiving, funding, developing, and growing Medical Justice, Dr. Segal has established himself as one of the country’s leading authorities on medical malpractice issues, counterclaims, and internet-based assaults on reputation.

Dr. Segal was a practicing neurosurgeon for approximately ten years, during which time he also played an active role as a participant on various state-sanctioned medical review panels designed to decrease the incidence of meritless medical malpractice cases.

Dr. Segal holds a M.D. from Baylor College of Medicine, where he also completed a neurosurgical residency. Dr. Segal served as a Spinal Surgery Fellow at The University of South Florida Medical School. He is a member of Phi Beta Kappa as well as the AOA Medical Honor Society. Dr. Segal received his B.A. from the University of Texas and graduated with a J.D. from Concord Law School with highest honors.

In 2000, he co-founded and served as CEO of DarPharma, Inc, a biotechnology company in Chapel Hill, NC, focused on the discovery and development of first-of-class pharmaceuticals for neuropsychiatric disorders.

Dr. Segal is also a partner at Byrd Adatto, a national business and health care law firm. With over 50 combined years of experience in serving doctors, dentists, and other providers, Byrd Adatto has a national pedigree to address most legal issues that arise in the business and practice of medicine.

Why Do Doctors Take Med-Mal Lawsuits So Personally?

med mal personally


Here’s a question that perplexes many plaintiff’s attorneys. I hear it all the time.  

Why do doctors take medical malpractice so personally?  

Why do doctors treat medical malpractice differently than being in an auto accident? Shouldn’t we just turn it over to our carriers and be done with it? I don’t think myself the worst driver if I get into a fender bender. I just turn it over to my auto insurer.  

The reason: The two systems have little in common. First, a med-mal lawsuit is packaged as an assault on your reputation. If you doubt that statement, just read the typical cut and paste summons. It often includes language such as “with willful and wanton neglect” and so on. It’s never couched in language such as “you are a talented doctor who made a mistake. We understand you are human and care deeply about your patients. But, with Mr. Smith, the injury has cost him lost wages and future medical costs.” 

Next, the subtext is that you will be tried by twelve lay-persons who know little about medical care – and your future will be tied to a theatrical battle of experts lasting about 4-5 years. And the outcome might very well cost more than policy limits – putting your entire nest egg at risk for ruin. 

You will spend a great deal of time preparing for and in depositions – time you could be earning revenue and taking care of patients.  

You are told not to talk about the case. It’s stressful to hold matters such as this inside. 

You will learn that medical malpractice settlements and judgments correlate more with the amount of injury as opposed to likelihood of negligence. In other words, death, stroke, loss of limb – high likelihood of payout. 

You will have to explain your record every time you apply for licensing and privileges.  

Settlements and judgments now appear on many state licensing board web sites. 

Settlement and judgments are posted in the National Practitioner Data Bank. 

You may hear an expert deliver testimony that has never been uttered before. And a jury might find his delivery credible and compelling.  

Against admonitions from a judge, jurors might visit various doctor rating sites to see what other patients think of you. Do they rate you as an arrogant, uncaring person who never listens? Or do they say they are thankful you got out of bed at 2AM to save their mother. Think this doesn’t impact a jury’s decision? I think it does.  

If you are a doctor in a high-risk specialty, there is a 99% chance you will be sued over your career.  

Recently I read of a doctor who took a med-mal case so personally he committed suicide. Am I surprised a doctor committed suicide over a lawsuit? No. Was he predisposed to depression? I don’t know. But, I know what the law says. It’s called the eggshell theory. You are liable for the patient as you find him. If his skull was as thin as an eggshell, and you negligently cracked it, you’re liable. It doesn’t matter that the same force wouldn’t have dented a normal skull. Likewise, many doctors experience depression for all sorts of reasons. But, the med-mal system IS a contributor. 

So, I close where I began. Most doctors take a medical malpractice lawsuit personally for good reasons. I’m more surprised plaintiff’s attorneys are surprised. 

What do you think? Click here to submit a comment and join the discussion.


ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Jeffrey Segal, MD, JD

Dr. Jeffrey Segal, Chief Executive Officer and Founder of Medical Justice, is a board-certified neurosurgeon. In the process of conceiving, funding, developing, and growing Medical Justice, Dr. Segal has established himself as one of the country’s leading authorities on medical malpractice issues, counterclaims, and internet-based assaults on reputation.

Dr. Segal holds a M.D. from Baylor College of Medicine, where he also completed a neurosurgical residency. Dr. Segal served as a Spinal Surgery Fellow at The University of South Florida Medical School. He is a member of Phi Beta Kappa as well as the AOA Medical Honor Society. Dr. Segal received his B.A. from the University of Texas and graduated with a J.D. from Concord Law School with highest honors.

Dr. Segal is also a partner at Byrd Adatto, a national business and health care law firm. With over 50 combined years of experience in serving doctors, dentists, and other providers, Byrd Adatto has a national pedigree to address most legal issues that arise in the business and practice of medicine.

If you have a medico-legal question, write to Medical Justice at infonews@medicaljustice.com.com.

47 Tips to Keep You Away from My ER

firmly grasp it

Recently, we published a piece by Dr. Rada Jones on the 68 Laws of the ER. She returns now for prescient and timely advice to patients on how to stay out of the ER.

The best way to do her post justice is to present it as is without editorial or comment. Enjoy!


I’m an ER doc. I care for patients. All patients: Those who need to be in the ER; those who don’t; those who wouldn’t be there if they knew better. For them, for you and for fun, I’ve got some tips to keep you happy, safe and away from my ER. Enjoy.

  1. Never, ever say “hold my beer and watch this!”  Besides “I do!” they are the most dangerous words ever spoken. They’re a harbinger of disaster worse than “Winter is coming.” They have their own section on YouTube – great watch after a rough day. Better than kittens. Still, hold on to your beer.
  2. NEVER drink and drive.  It’s obvious, but it’s obviously not obvious enough. As per  CDC, in 2016, 10,497 people died in alcohol-impaired driving crashes, accounting for 28% of all traffic-related deaths in the US. They’re still counting 2018.
  3. Same with drugs.  Any drugs. Legal, illegal, yours, or borrowed. Except for Tylenol. And Motrin. They’re OK.
  4. Don’t tell  your significant other that your life is no longer worth living, just to upset them. If they call 911, EMS will bring you to me. I’ll keep you until you’re legally sober if it takes a week.  By the time you’re sober, got your evaluation and went home, your significant other has had a chance to enjoy life without you. Speak wisely.
  5. Shoveling the roof is overrated.  Especially in winter. It comes with broken heels, fractured backs, and ER trips. The roof is for the birds.  And cats. You’re human. Stay on the ground.
  6. Your motorcycle?  The one you love? I love them too, but I sold mine. My first MCA patient came by ambulance. His leg followed in another car. I’ll get a motorcycle when I get terminal cancer. For now, I’ll stick with my car. Not your thing? At least wear a helmet.
  7. Do not, I repeat, do not, stick your hand in your snowblower to clean it. You may never be able to play the guitar or tie your shoes again. It may put a damper on your loving.  Yourself or others
  8. If you’ve been coughing for a week and you smoke, go buy honey.  Don’t come to the ER unless you have a fever, you’re short of breath or you have chest pain. You’ll cough for at least three weeks. There’s nothing I can do to stop that unless I kill you. That will stop your cough, but it’s illegal.
  9. Your twelve-years-of-God-awful-back-pain? Unless something’s really different today, the ER is not the place for it. Especially now, that Percocet has become a 4-letter word. You’ll wait, and wait. You’ll get a lot of rotten looks and a script for ibuprofen — 800 mg every 6 hrs — or acetaminophen — 1000 mg every 6hrs. That’s Motrin and Tylenol. Go get them over the counter.
  10. If you have an appointment with your doctor, don’t cancel it to come to the ER  instead because you’re too sick to see your doctor. Unless your doctor is Dr. Seuss, Dr. Pepper or a plastic surgeon, caring for sick people is what your doctor does. Keep your appointments.
  11. Don’t separate fighting dogs with your bare hands.  Dogs can handle dog bites better than you can. They come from wolves. We come from monkeys. We’re out of their league. Stay out of it or use a prop.
  12. Don’t throw gasoline on an open flame  unless you’re looking for a Brazilian wax.
  13. NEVER EVER stand around minding your own business.  It’s the most dangerous thing known to man. 90% of my assault victims were doing just that.
  14. Church is dangerous. That’s where my syncopal patients come from. They go to church, they faint, they fall, they break a hip. Bars are safer.
  15. Forget Dr. Google.  He’ll drive you insane worrying about improbable things that you can’t pronounce, let alone understand, and he won’t even give you a work note.
  16. If you’ve already seen a specialist for your problem, coming to the ER for a second opinion won’t help. I specialize in first opinions.
  17. Unless you’re actively trying to reproduce, use condoms. They are cheaper than medications, alimony, and college. The strawberry ones smell better than diapers.
  18. Get a flu shot. Beats getting the flu. It won’t give you the flu. If you got the flu last time you got a flu shot, it’s because they happen in the same season. The flu season.
  19. If you walk with a walker, avoid ladders.
  20. Turn off your oxygen tank before lighting up.  Even better, stop smoking.
  21. Don’t eat spicy food if you have diarrhea. You’ll get sensations like never before. Besides rectal lidocaine – which you won’t like – there’s little I can do for you. You’re gonna feel like a reverse fire-spitting dragon. As for diarrhea: One runny episode doesn’t count. Diarrhea is when you run out of toilet paper. 
  22. Vaccinate your children. The connection with autism is fake. The hack who made it up lost his license. Even if it was true – and it’s not – I’d rather have an autistic child than a dead one. If you trust Jenny McCarthy more than you trust your pediatrician, you should take your kids to her when they’re sick.
  23. Use protection. Use the guard of your saw. Use safety glasses when you’re welding. That’s not wimpy – that’s smart. Unlike lobsters, you don’t regrow limbs. Unlike spiders, you only have two eyes. Use them wisely. 
  24. Don’t hold your chainsaw between your legs  to start it. 
  25. Same with pouring hot coffee.  Set the cup down. It feels better.
  26. Don’t put on mascara while you’re driving. 
  27. We’re ER folks. We do emergencies. Our tests look for emergencies. If you come to the ER for anything but an emergency, you’re in the wrong place.  Seeing an ER doc for a non-emergent problem is like seeing a cardiologist for your diarrhea.
  28. Don’t leave your meds around for your toddler to sample. Check grandma’s house too.
  29. Fibromyalgia is seldom lethal  for patients, even though it kills me. 
  30. Get a doctor.  Your own. He’s better than me at managing your blood pressure, your diabetes, your ED (erectile dysfunction). Cheaper too. It will save you time – it’s gonna be a long wait if you’re here for a Viagra script. Plus, I have no free samples. 
  31. Help others.  Volunteer within your community. Focus less on yourself and more on others. It will make you happier and healthier.
  32. Get rid of your trampoline.  Unless you don’t like your kids that much.
  33. Don’t hurt my feelings  by telling me that you really, really hate doctors.
  34. Overweight is bad.  Bad for your back, bad for your knees, bad for your diabetes. We eat too much and we move too little. Next time you’re thinking Fudge Sundae, try an apple and a walk instead. I know, walking is for the dogs. Get one. People with pets are healthier, happier and have more fun. 
  35. If you’re calling the ER to ask how busy we are, you don’t need to come. 
  36. Get a dentist. Teeth are a great investment. They brighten your smile. They make you look younger. They’re prettier than tattoos. They chew your steak!
  37. Stop smoking!  You won’t set your house on fire. You’ll save money. Your doctor will stop harassing you. You’ll set a good example for your kids. Your car will smell better. So will you.
  38. Don’t lock your children in the car.  Ever. Not in summer, not in winter, not on Wednesdays. Find childcare or take them with you. Same with pets.
  39. Don’t fry bacon naked.
  40. Don’t ride your bike while you’re walking your dog.
  41. Don’t keep shampoo bottles on the floor. They tend to get lodged in people’s rectums.
  42. Don’t keep bleach in soda bottles. If you do, don’t leave them sitting around for your kids to drink them.
  43. Invest in a cock-ring with a release,  and a butt plug with a wide flange. It’s cheaper than a trip to the ED. Less embarrassing too. [Medical Justice editorial note: We defer to ER Physicians on such matters.] 
  44. If you can’t control your anger, punch a pillow.  Walls, doors, and windows tend to fight back.
  45. Never wear flip-flops to run, walk your dog or climb a ladder.
  46. Power tools, tree stands, and ladders don’t mix with alcohol.
  47. Same with anything fire related: Fireworks, fire pit, bonfire.
  48. Take your meds as prescribed. Your seizure meds, your blood pressure meds, your other meds. Except for other people’s meds. Don’t take other people’s meds. Not even if they’re the same color.
  49. Make good choices.  Not funny, I know. See below.

ladder

My husband. Who do you think is holding his beer?


ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Rada Jones is an Emergency Doc. Find her thriller,  OVERDOSE  on Amazon, and her writing on  RadaJonesMD.com.


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Doc, How Long Do I Have to Live?

how long to live


“Doc, how long do I have to live?”

When a patient has a difficult diagnosis, they want answers. That’s reasonable. They want to know how to structure the time they have left. Why? Priorities change. They want to get their affairs in order.

It’s also a question that determines whether a patient qualifies for government funding for hospice. For Medicare to write the check, a physician must certify the patient has less than six months to live. And that determination must be made within a medical certainty.

A case is currently marinating in the 11th US Circuit Court of Appeals which addresses civil and potential criminal liability based on the medical judgment of whether a patient will survive beyond 6 months.

The background:

AseraCare is a hospice provider. Between 2007 and 2009, AseraCare filed certifications with the government that patients had under half a year to live. The government believed many of these assertions were false and Asera intentionally filed false claims. These allegations were fueled by a whistleblower.

To prove its point, the government hired a specialist in hospice and palliative medicine. He reviewed AseraCare’s records. He concluded most of the 233 patients were likely to live longer than 6 months. So, they (and AseraCare) were not eligible for Medicare benefits. The government asserted AseraCare was liable under the False Claims Act based on filing false life-expectancy forms.

Not so fast.

AseraCare hired other experts who disagreed with the government. They concluded most of AseraCare’s patients actually had 6 months to live.

In 2013, the government’s expert moved some in the “not about to die” category into the “about to die” column. The expert’s rationale. “I was not the same physician in 2013 as I was in 2010.”

The jury ruled in favor of the government.

Again, not so fast.

U.S. District Judge Karon Bowdre overruled the jury. She opined how can our legal system conclude that one doctor’s prediction was “false” when other reasonable physicians, looking at the same data, would make the same prediction? Isn’t a reasonable disagreement a matter of judgment and not a statement of fact? The judge concluded a mere difference of clinical judgment—here, regarding conditions for a medical certification of hospice eligibility—is not enough to show that the claims are objectively false under the False Claims Act (FCA)

Here, the dispute over False Claims is civil and about money.

But, false claims can also trigger criminal liability. Which would mean a reasonable disagreement could land a certifying physician in prison. True, the threshold would be beyond a reasonable doubt and the certifying doctor would have intended to file a false claim? But, in a battle of experts, anything is possible.

Most glioblastoma patients die within a narrow time frame. But not all. Some live 5 years. Some live even longer.

Even when we say a patient has 6 months to live, we are really stating there’s X% probability the person will live 6 months. Not much different than actuarial tables for an insurance company. They are making statements about statistics and populations. In that population, most fall within a standard curve. But there are outliers.

Do we really want to criminalize a failure to predict whether someone lives or dies within 6 months – which arguably is already an arbitrary number?

As two prominent trial lawyers noted in an op-ed piece:

Some medical judgments can be false. But the government is trying to create a standard that is far too broad. Professional disagreement should not be illegal.

What do you think?


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ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Jeffrey Segal, MD, JD

Dr. Jeffrey Segal, Chief Executive Officer and Founder of Medical Justice, is a board-certified neurosurgeon. In the process of conceiving, funding, developing, and growing Medical Justice, Dr. Segal has established himself as one of the country’s leading authorities on medical malpractice issues, counterclaims, and internet-based assaults on reputation.

Dr. Segal holds a M.D. from Baylor College of Medicine, where he also completed a neurosurgical residency. Dr. Segal served as a Spinal Surgery Fellow at The University of South Florida Medical School. He is a member of Phi Beta Kappa as well as the AOA Medical Honor Society. Dr. Segal received his B.A. from the University of Texas and graduated with a J.D. from Concord Law School with highest honors.

Dr. Segal is also a partner at Byrd Adatto, a national business and health care law firm. With over 50 combined years of experience in serving doctors, dentists, and other providers, Byrd Adatto has a national pedigree to address most legal issues that arise in the business and practice of medicine.

If you have a medico-legal question, write to Medical Justice at infonews@medicaljustice.com.com.